Earlier today a fruit seller came up to us and asked ‘Me been here?’
We looked at each other. Errrm, yes, you’ve been here, you were here earlier. ‘No no, Me been here?’ she asked again, pointing at the beach by our feet. We both looked where she was pointing, hoping for some clue as to what she was asking us as though there would be anything else but sand.
Yes, said Nel again, you been here, pointing at the sand too.
‘Me! Me! Here!’ Yes, yes, you’re here!
Ha! She’s trying to freak out the foreigners I thought.
Me been here too, me still here.
‘No! No! Me! Me! ‘ she was beginning to get frustrated! ‘Me! Me!’
I sussed it. White Hat? I asked, pointing pointlessly at my head, with no kind of hat at all on it. ‘Yes! White Hat’ she said. Nel went on to explain she’d been here an hour ago. White Hat Lady is called Me, see?
And the British are derided for not bothering to learn languages. With a quick mind like mine speaking foreign is unnecessary. And shouting, as we all know, works well too.
In Thailand, Kev tells us, a firm stool is a sign of poor health, and I have no reason to disbelieve him apart from the reasons I outlined earlier.
Also, the toilets, he tells us, aren’t designed to cope with toilet paper. These two facts are very alarming to westerners although us boaters are more used to dealing with the hard facts and unpalatable truths when it comes to toilets.
The Thai solution to this dilemma is the hose pipe bidet. A similar device can be bought from any B&Q or garden centre and t’s nothing more or less than a hose pipe with a garden sprinkler on the end. It takes a little practice and it was quite a shock initially but it works very well, and, so long as you exercise caution, it’s very enjoyable. What’s more, when used together with the camphor and eucalyptus cooling talc they sell here, it leaves you with a cool minty freshness!
I shall leave it at that because I’m imagining the look on my mother’s face.
This morning we went somewhere different for breakfast, wary as we are of trespassing on that bloody mangey dog’s territory again.
They don’t serve banana pancakes for breakfast there, so I had the English breakfast with Wiltshire bacon, believe it or not. But here you get a salad garnish with your bacon and eggs, and I’m sure that’s not right. And I think it’s the first non Thai food I’ve eaten since getting here.
A woman came by, it seemed that she was known and she yelled and shouted with a yolk dangling two baskets of wares for sale. Drinks, pastries, squid things on sticks, all manner of goodies. The lady who ran the cafe bought pastries, which really isn’t much of an advert for your own food is it? When you buy your own food from a shouty old lady with a basket?
She was also selling Coke from a big bottle which she poured into clear plastic bags and stuck a straw into. Maybe she was shouting ‘Who wants a bag of coke’ I’d like to think so.
Nel’s fine now except for a a bit of a bruised ankle, a sick and achey feeling from the jab the same as when we had the jabs at home and a dislike of dogs. Tonight we saw that there were 2 policemen where that cur hangs around. They were kitted out with padding and gloves and I wondered whether somebody had reported Nel’s bite or whether somebody else had been nipped and they’d come out to kill it, but then later I’m sure we saw the same dog, this time on the other side of the crossroads. We’d assumed it was guarding the patch by where she’d sneaked up from. She stood on the path looking at us. Nel turned away and walked back where we’d come from and I shooed it away. It just started and slunk away no problem. I’m sure if I’d have seen it she wouldn’t have nipped her.
Nel had the Thai Pad salad for dinner, and I ordered something called Fried Yellow Powder with chicken,
I tried asking the waitress what kind of yellow powder it was that they fried but she just said yellow powder and couldn’t explain any more.
I’d asked Kevin and Jayne what it was when they were here last weekend and they’d said they didn’t know but Kev said it was good, and I had no reason to disbelieve him at the time. Anyway, I think it was fenugreek, or custard. Maybe both, but that’s one I won’t be having again anyway.
There is also a section in the menu called Urgent Food, and we have no idea how urgent or why the urgency.